10.Them yiffy babes
9.Not having to differentiate between you and your pet when
8.The ability to carry on a good conversation about the Lion King
7.Playing fetch is just so much darn fun! (by Oren the Otter)
6.Those collars are coming back in style
5.Never wanting for something to cuddle
4.Costume contest Prize money
3.No furry has ever won a Darwin award.
2.The chance to be the first furry Darwin award winner
10. 20-1 male-female ratio at cons
9.those bleedin Plushophiles invading 'our' con
8.getting a rash from the facepaint
7.yanked tails, tails in doors, tails in chairs.
6.some people just can't tell the difference between Balto and
5.the primary communication network is the ever-so-reliable
4.Pebble the Penguin*
3.Pebble the Penguin was made by Don Bluth
2.exhorbant dry cleaning bills for 'unusual garments'
1.Disney cut half of Vitani's lines
20.Scar was able to think "outside the
box" to accomplish his goals
19.Scars wife was far more loyal
18.Simbas wife routinely defeated him in physical combat
17.Scars legacy will last far longer than Simba's
16.Simba was way too wishy washy
15.Scar's sidekicks could eat Simba's sidekicks
14.Scar had about three times as many allies as Simba
13.Scar is about five times smarter than the rest of the pride
12.Scar sang for himself
11.Zira sang for herself
10.Scar as a much larger vocabulary, even with fewer lines
9.Scar's heir may not be much, but he was male.
8.Scar's heir managed to conquer Simba's heir before she had even
begun to rule
7.Scar could tell that his firstborn was incapable of rule
6.Simba got called a monkey twice, and he never noticed
5.Scar managed to call Simba a monkey without him noticing
4.Simba's daughter insulted herself pointlessly three times in
3.Scar doesn't have a daughter with a self esteem problem
2.Scar inspired too many would-be leaders (Kovu, Zira, Nuka),
while Simba didn't father one (Kiara!? I think not.)
1.Scar's heir won out in the end
Top Ten advantages to being a 15 year old fur-fan! -by Roland Bloodthunder 10. No one looks at you funny when you buy stuff based on the mascot's
9. No one objects to you getting a second ID for you in your fursuit.
8. No one objects to letting you use your fursuit as the school's mascot.
7. You used the schools money to build that suit.
6. Wearing your fursuit suddenly becomes a demostration of "school spirit",
and everyone starts encouraging it.
5. The ultimate "teacher's pet" prank...
4. You'd be surprized at exactly how much money your parents are willing to
give you for your "halloween costume"
3. No one can figure out what "yiff" means, and no one seems to object when
you use it in a sentence. Or barking or yelping or meowing for that matter.
2. When you start to act like a fox (or dog or cat or whatever you are)
everyone thinks that it is "cool".
1. Everyone thinks it's perfectly normal adolecent behavior when you start
to mark trees.
Top Ten downsides to being a 15 year old fur-fan! -by Roland Bloodthunder 10. Your parents won't uprage your computer's software so that you can
watch online cartoons.
9. You have to keep "the hampster dance" website in another window to
disguise what furry site you are REALLY looking at.
8. Sometime's you get caught anyway, no matter how hard you try #9.
7. Can't join Furrymuck.
6. Even if you COULD do #7, you couldn't, um, enjoy it to the full extent.
5. ALL the furry comic books are for Adults Only.
4. All the good furry websites are for Adults Only.
3. There are just some jokes that make fun of things you can't relate to
2. When you get caught drawing furries in art class, you get in BIG
trouble, no matter HOW much you plead that it was just a "Female Anatomical
1. Your parents refues to let you go to ConFurences. Not like you could get
(by Jay Matthew Fenster) For those of you who asked, "Can You Feel the Love Tonight," I have a message...
THAT AIN'T EXACTLY LOVE!
Even in a wholesome movie like Disney's The Lion King there's absolutely tons of secxx just waiting to be found by voyeurs like me who have nothing better to do with their time. Here's the Top Ten Sexually Explicit Lines in The Lion King. 10. Oh, no, not the birdie boiler!!!
9. Pumbaa, not in front of the kids.
8. Here's the bottom line, our trio's down to two.
7. First, I'm gonna take your stick.
6. She doesn't have to know. Nobody has to know.
5. This is just for you and your Daddy.
4. I hate dangling!
3. That lousy Mufasa, I won't be able to sit down for a week!
2. Lie down before you hurt yourself.
1. Slimy, yet satisfying
You know that Your Cat has "Dipped the 'Nip" a little Too Much when...-by BAR-1 10. He replaces the cat-door with a small bead curtain.
9. He begins printing communist literature: "Kittens of the World Unite!"
8. He purrs, then clutches the ground screaming "Holy $#!+, it's an EARTHQUAKE!!"
7. He begins playing the sitar, and marries Yoko Ono.
6. No longer averse to dogs. In fact, is now quite fond of Scooby Doo.
5. Still lands on his feet after a fall.... but now tends to stagger around and bump into things when on floor.
4. Uninterested in catching real mice, because he can't get a buzz off of them.
3. Previous finicky eating replaced by taste for nothing but brownies.
2. Converts his scratching post into giant bong....
and the nuber 1 way to tell when your Cat has a "Plush Mousie on his Back"....
1. Instead of knocking over Christmas Tree, your Cat tries to roll it into a joint!!
Top Ten Good\Bad Things About Being Born a Furry - by Talon 10. Having refined senses. (Human society stinks)
9. Pack behavior.
8. No one in your family notices you're a furry.
7. Having a natural tolerance to raw meat.
6. A Preference to get your food fresh from the forest.
5. Looking at humans as just another animal.
4. Having no difference between picking something up with your hands or mouth
3. Using your tongue and paw to groom yourself.
2. Marking your territory.
1. Having never been HUMAN. *
*As I look upon the masses of humanity, with their strange behavior never before seen in nature, I wonder what it would be like to be one of them. Then I look at the individuals, all acting differently but still trying to achieve the same goals, and I am thankful that I am me. (I'm fairly sure that this is a good thing)
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